I guess I never really cared to much about whether or not I have been called a boy in the past, but the more I think about I appreciate being referred to as a man, but I don't think I'll be to offended at this time in my life to be called a boy. When we look at colleges sports and how media refers to team they don't call them the boys football team or the girls soccer team. They refer to them as the MEN'S football team or the WOMEN'S soccer team. I wonder what kind of guff a reporter would get for calling the UVU or BYU woman's soccer teams girls soccer teams. You might almost think of it as disrespectful because they are at a higher stage of life and have moved on past being girls. I do my best to refer to my girlfriends as ladies when i say hello or goodbye to them in groups. It does seem more respectful and I've just gotten used to saying it. I do however find my self using "guys" in the plural sense when referring to a group of men and women together. I guess I can't think of a better term at the moment. Does anyone out there have a good one for me to use when refering to men and women in a group?
And I'll tell you right now that I don't mind being called Sir. But for men it seems more distinguished and it makes you feel more important. It seems quite the opposite for women. It almost seems that most woman don't like being called Mam because it denotes being older than they really are. It almost seems like that's the way society has caused it to be used. To almost denote a negative context. I wonder how it got that way. I don't think I have ever used the term mam in a negative way, that I know of. But I also don't go around calling all woman, mam.
You have made a good point. when i am around men and women i usually say guys and gals, because gals would be in the same context as guys. I want to know if any women out there would find this offensive?? I know I know it can be very hard to please a woman... Guys we just have to do the very best that we can to make sure that they feel respected and cherrished. i dont mean that in a disrespectful way either, i really mean it.
ReplyDeleteI hate being called ma'am! I already work with a bunch of high-school kids who think 25 is ancient, so when I go out and whoever is serving me calls me that, I tend to laugh and say "oh please!" I know they have been instructed by their superior to use ma'am and sir as a sign of respect, but I am really okay not hearing it. As far as what to call a combined group of men and women- "people" works. :) But I really don't think it is that big a deal to most of us. There are ways that any thing can be said and end up sounding offensive or derogatory- so just watch yourself!
ReplyDeleteI like being called gals. And in a big group of men and women, guys and gals works. "People" works too. Unless you come across a hardcore feminist, I think most guys are safe with whatever, as long as it's not crazy offensive.
ReplyDeleteGuys hate it when I call them boys. I just have a habit of when there are a bunch of boys together to call them boys! Also when there is just a group of kids together in general I usually call them 'Kids' and people get offended all the time.
ReplyDeleteAs for me I don't mind what people call me. I mean let us be honest here. Just because I am 20 doesn't mean that I don't still feel like a little girl a lot of the time. At the same time just because I am 20 doesn't mean that I don't feel very old sometimes. I live in an apartment complex where I am about as old as it gets and it feels weird. I feel like a mom sometimes taking in my roommates and those around me like I am their mama.
I hate when people are like a gentlewoman instead of just saying gentleman. Then again I am not all that outraged about stuff like that.
Having grown up in the south, sir and mam are considered essential parts of conversation. I remember being taught in school the importance of a proper response. Anyone older than me was sir or mam. When I was in high school, te friends of my younger siblings answered me with sir. When you called someone older by their first name, you put a mister or miss in front of the name.
ReplyDeleteWhen I moved to Utah, I was on the phone at work with someone from another department. She asked me a multitude of questions, by which I replied every answer with yes or no mam. Shortly after I hung with her, my supervisor found me to tell me that this woman felt as though I was very rude and sarcastic with her. He told her that I refer to everyone by sir or mam, and that I was from the south. Her reply..."well I'm not!"